Monday, July 24, 2006

Clerks II Review: Almost as good as my first time with Boba Fett

I saw Clerks II yesterday. How does one describe something that moves in four dimensions, existing in a universe that has but three? The same can be said of Clerks II? How do mere mortal words give you the true picture of madness and mania that is Clerks II? It’s power geek quantum zeit geist at it’s best.

Clerks II raises three very important questions that beg answers, and will leave you up long into the night, puzzling them out.

1) Transformers. Sure, they’re more than meets the eye, but : are they gifts from God, or, are they pawns of the Desolate One set upon mankind to bring about our downfall and steal our souls?

2) Can one indeed dance to King Diamond?

3) What the fuck is in the New Jersey water? It has to be some strange shit, because Clerks and Clerks II and Kevin Smith et. al. came from there, and so far, no one’s fessing up to alien hybrid experiments, so what other explanation can there be?

Seriously, Clerks I was one of my favorite movies, so I was nervous about seeing II. Would it live up to the hype? Would it fall flat like most sequels? Or, would it like Empire Strikes Back, stand out as the strongest, darkest and most powerful of the get? All I can say is you will not be disappointed. Seeking Clerks II was ALMOST as good as seeing Boba Fett for the first time.

I also feel compelled to say, that as a total SW geek, I must heartily agree again with the erudite commentary from Randal on what is the ONLY meaningful ‘Trilogy’ and ONLY ‘Return’, and therefore the only ones valid of notice. I also found his review of the collection of LOTR movies both inspired, accurate, and as always entertaining. Joel Segal could learn a thing or two from this man: if he stayed in the theater that is.

Thank you Kevin Smith.

This post’s dedicated to the union contractors who took one for the team on the second Death Star at the hands of the Rebellion terrorists.


Larry the Male Fan said...

Hi Christine! I'm not really a Kevin Smith fan, but your review was great! I might actually think of seeing the movie now. By the way, did you ever rent the documentary film, AN EVENING WITH KEVIN SMITH? It was just him on the lecture set going to different colleges, but he says a lot of really interesting things about Hollywood. Some of the stories he tells about script writing are way funnier than the stuff he puts in his movies!

I would love to read your blog every day at work, by the way, but they have all the good sites blanked out. Talk about time management nazis!

Christine said...

Thanks Larry! I'll lend you Clerks before you go. You have to see that first. You're from the right age group to 'get it'.

I'm going to ask Tim to track down An Evening With...Sounds like just the ticket.

Thanks for the blog compliment, but hey, the paying job takes precedence (bastards though they may be!)